Hacienda Community episode:
Hi, my name is Mayumi, and I’m here to tell you about one of the most exciting sex-positive parties I’ve ever attended!
Welcome to my podcast series exploring different open-minded destinations and events around the world. I’ll share everything that matters to a party-goer from vibe check to dress code, so you can choose the swinger experience that best suits your style.
I have been researching and working with sexuality and open-minded communities for over a decade. I’ve traveled the world attending numerous events at the invitation of the Ysos app, a dating app that connects sexually-liberal people interested in fulfilling their fantasies, exploring fetishes, and embracing the swinger lifestyle.
Whether you’re in a relationship looking for others, or single with a taste for adventure, Ysos is the app for new connections.
I recently visited New York City and checked out an exciting sex-positive concept space. It’s called Hacienda Community and this venue brings a fresh approach to the swinger scene. It’s a young, vibrant community in both body and spirit!
Many people assume that sex venues are always super innovative and full of open-minded people, but in reality, they often feel outdated—especially in more established swinger circles.
Most clubs look the same, with a dated aesthetic, and the parties tend to be repetitive and predictable, from the themes to the decor and setup.
But Hacienda completely breaks this pattern. The community consists of young participants, mostly in their 20s and 30s, and it promotes diversity in every sense—from the people attending to the practices encouraged.
To visit Hacienda’s parties, you must first be approved by the community. But here’s an important detail: selection is not based on photos, looks, or aesthetic standards, which is common for these types of sex-forward events.
Instead, you fill out a form explaining why you want to participate, your experience in the sex-positive world, and whether you know someone who can sponsor or mentor you in the community.
After that, Hacienda will contact you via email with event dates that allow new guests, and assign you a mentor—someone already part of the community who will accompany you to your first event. This person will later determine if you’re the right fit for Hacienda based on your behavior and respect for other participants.
And on your first night, before the party even starts, you attend a 30-minute orientation session. During this time, new members are introduced to the community’s guidelines, best practices, and how to communicate clear and verbal consent.
In other words, everything must be asked and clearly agreed upon. If someone does not say explicitly, “I want this” or “I permit this,” consent cannot be assumed, and therefore, the boundary cannot be crossed.
I found this approach to be really well-structured and educational.
And it was pretty amusing to see a room full of people in barely any clothing, sitting through a class before the party even started!
Honestly, just the intro alone makes a big difference and helps create a safer and more welcoming environment for everyone.
The party takes place in a beautifully decorated house with multiple floors and plenty of social spaces.
There’s a dance floor, private rooms, an outdoor area, a bar, jacuzzi, and a basement playroom with mattresses everywhere—where, at a certain point in the night, things get spicy.
I attended a BDSM-themed night, so there were a lot of domination and submission interactions, with many things happening at once—you could either watch or participate.
What impressed me the most was the attention to detail and the energy of the attendees. The average age was much younger than in other clubs I’ve visited, and the atmosphere was completely welcoming.
At the entrance, they gave out colored wristbands to indicate whether you were open to interaction or just there to watch—so you could communicate your preference right from the start.
I highly recommend it! Hacienda offers a fresh perspective on the swinger lifestyle, which at times, really needs some innovation—both in terms of practices and community.
I for sure plan to return!
So when you’re ready to explore this world and meet open-minded people, the Ysos dating app is where to start. With the app, you can find amazing people to share experiences with and even plan your next sex-positive adventure. Download the app now:
ysos for Android
ysos for iPhone
I hope you enjoyed my review of Hacienda Community in New York, part of a 12-episode review about clubs and venues designed for the sexually curious. See you at the next destination!